20 of the Best Things People Learned From Therapy
Twitter is always full of gems, from Chrissy Teigen's latest random musings to the occasional heart melting doggo video.
But recently, a tweet went viral that might be better than any viral tweet.
The message from Twitter user @CarolineMoss was simple: "If you go to therapy quote tweet this with the best thing you learned at therapy that way everyone else can get free therapy."
And people on Twitter showed. up.
The results were incredible and the advice was so wide-ranging and important, we wanted to gather our favorite responses for you.
Come back to this article whenever you're looking for inspiration or guidance as you navigate something specific or just life in general.
1. "My therapist told me: You can be your own witness."
"It completely blew my mind, I was so used to thinking that my word about a negative experience wasn't good enough, that I needed witnesses to it in order to make it something I was allowed to be hurt by."
2. "Every behavior is a need trying to be met."
3. "Your thoughts/feelings/impulses are not you.
"They're neurological phenomena you've been conditioned to experience in response to stimulus. You can respond to them in one of four ways:
• Reactively indulge them
• Reactively suppress them
• Consciously engage with them (if useful)
• Consciously release them (if not useful)
Reactive response are generally a product of trauma, but your agency to choose another response is largely a product of mental habits."
4. "Society doesn’t need to be the one to set my schedule.
"I’m allowed to eat breakfast at 11, go to bed at 1am. There’s no correct mold to fit, just find whatever works best for me."
5. "Don’t react. Sit with it until you know what you feel. Sit with it."
"Oh, if you do something to elicit a response from someone else, you are engaging in negative behavior. If you do something to respond to your needs, you’re doing something positive."
6. "Needing medication is not a bad thing."
"If you were a diabetic and unable to produce insulin, you would need to take insulin. Needing mental health medication is like that, your body needs something it cannot produce on its own."
7. "Never compare yourself to other people…"
"but even more importantly never compare yourself to fantasy versions of how your life would’ve turned out had you made a different choice."
8. "Do not attempt to understand why a dysfunctional person does what they do."
"Dysfunction has no logic behind it. Knowing this, has spared me anxiety and unneeded turmoil."
9. "Identify behavior that helped you cope with growing up in a dysfunctional family, but doesn't serve you well as an adult."
"Recognizing the pattern is the first step towards doing things differently now."
10. "If you can imagine the worst thing, you can imagine the best thing."
"Both things are imaginary. Say outloud verbally the positive outcome, repeat until it feels more real."
11. "Avoid saying 'should.'"
"It's too easy to fall into pressuring yourself and pushing yourself too much. Reframe and rephrase:
I should exercise ➡️ I like how I feel after exercise I should do laundry ➡️ I want clean clothes."
12. "Don’t beat yourself up for not knowing things that you hadn’t learned yet."
13. "My therapist asked me 'Whose voice do you hear when you judge yourself?'
"Finding this answer was the most freeing feeling."
14. "That as a black woman I need to not shrink in order to accommodate others with my existence."
15. "Before you spiral into anxiety and panic: Resist speculating."
"Look at the situation and ask yourself 'What do I know to be true?'"
16. "Anxiety is not intuition."
17. "Cut toxic people out of your life, or try to minimize the time you spend with them.
"If someone, even a family member, constantly makes you feel bad, you don't owe them your time. It's OK and healthy to set strict boundaries and say NO to toxic people."
18. "Break everything down into smaller pieces."
"No, smaller. No, even smaller. The first step to taking a shower is walking to the bathroom."
19. "Trauma, especially unrecognized or unresolved trauma, affects your behavior and coping mechanism in ways you can't identify."
"It creates cycles, it harms yourself and others. There are ways to step out of this behavior but you can only do so when you are ready to address it."
20. "Everyone is going to demand 100% from you, but if you give 100% to everyone every time, you'll burn out quick."
"Don't let people's expectations define how much of yourself to give away, it is O K A Y for you to set those limits/boundaries for yourself."
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